


It's All Coming Back to Me Now

by icegirl99



Series: Short Stories Inspired by Songs [4]
Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, Kissing, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:15:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23639680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icegirl99/pseuds/icegirl99
Summary: Nearly five years have passed since Copia last saw Papa Emeritus III. Now at a meet and greet as Papa IV, Copia sees the man he never thought he'd see again.Set in summer 2021.
Relationships: Cardinal Copia/Papa Emeritus III, Papa Emeritus IV/Papa Emeritus III
Series: Short Stories Inspired by Songs [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1614253
Comments: 13
Kudos: 24





	It's All Coming Back to Me Now

**Author's Note:**

> Based off the song It's All Coming Back to Me Now by Celine Dion.

I was standing behind the curtain. "This is the last one boss," the photographer whispered to me, indicating that the last fan for the meet and greet was about to come around the corner. 

When I saw the slender male frame step into view, I froze. I knew that body...or I thought I did. But there was no way he could have gotten a ticket without me knowing…

"Hello, Papa," he said and I swallowed hard. It was him. The voice, the accent...all of it. 

He lifted his head and I caught his gaze immediately, beautiful mismatched eyes staring into my own. "Alessandro?" I whispered. 

"In the flesh," Papa said with a smile. 

My heart fluttered as I took a deep breath. I never thought I'd see him again. Our relationship had ended on such a bad note that I never again wanted to lay eyes on him.. 

But that was years ago. I had moved on, or at least that's what I told myself. When he had left me I had promised myself that I wouldn't spend weeks, days or even hours crying over him. I banished every memory of him and moved on with my life. 

"Are we going to take a picture?" Papa asked, that smile still on his face.

Damn him, I thought. "Yes, yes," I said, nervously shuffling over to the marked spot on the floor. I pulled at my fingers for a few moments before I felt him gently take my hand and guide us into the usual position. 

I was dazed. His touch left my body tingling in a way that I hadn't felt in years, even through the clothes. The gloves and my blue and gold robes...the weight of his arm around my waist felt familiar and foreign all at the same time. 

The quick flash of the camera brought some of my wits around and I stepped away. I felt oddly cold and shivered. 

"Enjoy the show, Alessandro," I muttered and waved at the door awkwardly. 

"Andrea…" His voice was soft and I almost whimpered. I had loved that tone. I didn't know why he was here or even how he had gotten here without someone recognizing him. 

He didn't move and I knew that my resolve was fading quickly. "Leave us." The instruction was for the photographer and the security guards. 

"But Papa-," the photographer said. 

"I know I have approximately 20 minutes," I said, never breaking eye contact with Papa. "I won't be late. Go now." They only hesitated for a moment. 

Silence fell and I finally dropped my head. I felt him move closer to me. His warm hands were on my shoulders. Comforting warmth spread throughout me. "Has anyone ever told you how stunning you look in these?" Papa whispered. 

"They're not really my style," I muttered shyly. 

"They are exactly your style, my darling," he insisted. "You just don't know it yet." 

I shrugged. "I've been Papa for over a year now, I am not used to it."

"It takes time," Papa said. "Do you not remember how long it took me to adjust?"

"I don't," I said and whether or not that was true, I didn't know. I had tried to forget everything about him. "You were born to be Papa, I wasn't." 

"Still, here you are." He stepped back and again I found myself missing his touch. 

I stared at the wall and bit my lip for a moment. "Why are you here, Alessandro?" I asked. "It's been almost five years. I have moved on."

"Have you, really?" Papa said. He stepped toward me again and I couldn't stop my breathing from increasing. The sensations my body was feeling were familiar yet long forgotten. I licked my lips as I looked into his intense gaze. "I can still get you so worked up…" 

His hand brushed my painted cheek and I gasped quietly. "Do you remember, Andrea?" Papa whispered. "How I would touch you like this? And how I would kiss you after?" His lips were on mine suddenly and it was like an electric shock went through my body. I froze, yet moaned heavily at the same time. 

Papa's arm wrapped around my waist underneath my cape and he pulled me flush against him. 

Our lips moved together and I instinctively opened my mouth for him. His tongue sought out mine and suddenly my mind was transported back to a warm summer night, six years ago just after we had come home from his recent tour…

*There was desperation in our touches. Each of us tugged at the other's clothing, shedding it as quickly as possible. Our kisses were passionate and rough. The desire was strong. We needed one another more than ever before…*

We broke apart with a loud gasp and I tumbled backward, only able to just catch myself from falling. We were both breathless and my body was alight in a strong fire. A fire I hadn't felt in five years. 

I met his eyes as I panted for breath. His lips were swollen and his eyes had darkened. I could also see the slight arousal in the front of his pants.

"I never forgot, Andrea," he whispered. "Not for one second. And I don't think you did either." He turned and started towards the black curtain. 

I don't know what compelled me to do this, but I couldn't stop myself. I flung myself across the small room and grabbed his arm. "Wait, Alessandro," I said desperately. Papa stopped and looked at me. "You never answered me. Why here? Why now?" 

He smiled at me. "Because I can't forget you anymore." His other hand grabbed the curtain and pulled it aside. "It's been 20 minutes. You need to go." 

"Wh-" I struggled with my words. I shook my head and blinked at him. My brain was a foggy mess of emotions. I needed this but I didn't know why I was so desperate. "What if I want to see you again?" 

Papa nodded with the smile still on his face. "I know where to find you." I stared at him for a second longer, wondering how he knew that but looked away when I realized that I was going to be late for my queue. 

~*~

I didn't see Papa in the crowd that night but I had a feeling I wouldn't. It was hard for me to keep my focus on the performance and I found myself exiting the stage more often as I needed those few precious moments to attempt to clear my mind. It was futile I realized about half way through the set list as I thought more and more about him. 

Flashes of our time together would momentarily distract me from the crowd and I'd have to force myself to focus. 

I wouldn't be lying if I said I was glad when the ritual ended and I was able to be alone with my thoughts. 

I pulled at my collar as it felt restricting, my breathing had also increased again. My body had been in an almost constant state of arousal. 

The memories were foggy at best as I kept buried them deep inside. But I remembered the fights, the arguments that would leave us not speaking to each other for days. Eventually the fighting would lead to the lies. I knew he was seeing and fucking other people. I began to resent him and that led to me doing the exact same thing to him. 

I suppose it was something that neither of us were proud of, even years later when we hadn't seen or spoken one another in a very long time.

My body and mind were both exhausted by the time I got to my hotel room. I didn't bother with trying to do anything other than shedding my clothes, taking a quick shower and collapsing into my bed. 

I awoke to the sound of knocking at my door. I was still heavy from the sleep and wasn't quite awake. I considered just ignoring it, but something compelled me to get up and answer it. 

"Hello, Andrea." Papa's smooth voice greeted me. 

I looked up at him, swallowing and taking a breath. I felt my heart flutter. "You found me," I whispered. It wasn't a question. I knew he would. 

"I did," he agreed. "May I come in? That is, if you want me to." 

I stepped aside and closed the door behind him. When I turned around he was standing there, less than a foot away from me. "I miss you," Papa whispered. "The nights of endless pleasure, the warmth of having you in my arms..."

"You broke my heart, Alessandro," I muttered as I felt my chest tighten and tears threatened to fall. 

"I don't miss our arguments and I can't take back what I did to hurt you, Andrea," Papa said. "But you hurt me just as much." 

"I know," I whispered, finally letting my tears fall. I didn't think there were any second chances between us. We had hurt each other too deeply for that. 

He reached out and gripped my arm comfortingly. I stared at his hand. I felt many things in that moment; sorrow, pain, comfort, forgiveness, and love. 

I raised my head and looked at him through blurry eyes. The look on his face showed that he was still very much in love with me and I knew that deep down, I felt the same. 

I pulled my arm and Papa fell forward into my arms. He looked up at me through his own tears. The look in his eyes had my heart aching in an entirely different way. I wanted him. I needed him. Everything that we had before came flooding back to me and I knew what I had to do. My arms slipped around his waist and I kissed him passionately. 

"I need you, Alessandro," I whispered desperately, once we parted, breathless and resting our foreheads together. "I tried to forget, I really did. But there were nights where I was so cold, I cried for your warmth. The hot summer days I wished I had you to enjoy them with. I would cry until my eyes were so dry, I couldn't anymore." 

"Do you want to remember, my love?" Papa asked me gently. 

"I want to do more than just remember," I cried. "I want to experience it all again." I took his face in my hands and stared into his eyes. "Without the fighting," I laughed lightly. 

"I can help you with that." Papa kissed me again. His tongue slipping into my mouth almost immediately and circling mine. We kissed like this for a little while, sucking and lightly teasing each other's tongues and lips. 

As our kisses became more heated, our hands roamed each other's body. I wore a pair of blue silk pajamas and Papa was dressed in a t-shirt and dark jeans. I worked my hands under his shirt and pushed it up. We parted so that I could pull it off of him. My pajama top followed and was discarded with his shirt on the floor next to the door. 

"Andrea," Papa whispered as his hands slipped down my back to rest on my hips. I expected him to drop them lower but he did not. 

"Yes, Papa," I replied when I saw the desire shining in his eyes. I knew what he wanted. "Take me to bed." 

He laughed quietly and kissed me again. "Heh, I should be calling you Papa." 

I blushed. "You will always be my Papa, Alessandro," I whispered, threading my hand into his hair and pulling his lips back to mine. 

He smiled and I gasped suddenly as Papa lifted me up into his arms, carrying me to the bed. He set me down and crawled in next to me. Papa reached for me and I rolled on top of him. Bracing my arms on either side of him, I dropped my head and began kissing along his neck. His skin was not marked and this surprised me. My Pope had always been one to indulge in slightly rough pleasures of the flesh. "You haven't slept with anyone recently." 

"I didn't want anyone but you," Papa replied, threading his fingers through my hair and pushing my head down. I opened my mouth and sucked on him. "I missed the way my body looks after taking so well to your abuses, Andrea." I bit down on the bruise I had just made and Papa moaned. 

"I will give you more," I whispered, nibbling over his throat. I picked another spot and licked over it before biting down again. He cried out and lifted his body up. When I looked up at him, there were unshed tears in his eyes. 

"I'm so sorry," he said, voice breaking. Papa brought his hand up and gently pushed me off him. The rejection stung and I felt my own tears running down my cheeks. I turned away from him and sobbed into the pillow. "No, no," Papa soothed as he pet over my hair. "No more crying, my love. I am asking for your forgiveness." I rolled over and Papa pulled me into his arms, placing little kisses on every inch of me that he could reach with his lips. "Can you forgive me, darling?" 

"Can you forgive me, Alessandro?" I cried. I knew that I had hurt him just as much. 

"I already have," Papa replied. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't." He smiled at me. 

I smiled back. "I forgive you, Papa," I whispered. "But you have to promise me something." I turned my head and kissed him gently. 

"What is it that you wish for me to promise?" he asked. 

"That you'll stay," I pleaded. We had found each other again and although it had been years, I felt the old wounds threatening to open up if he left me again. 

"I have no intentions on leaving you again, Andrea," Papa assured me. "I promise you." 

I felt relief and warmth wash over me and I pushed myself up. "I love you, Alessandro," I said. "And I forgive you. For everything…" We kissed again, hot and heavy.

"Let's make love, my darling. I love you too, Andrea." 

I nodded and cupped Papa's face between my palms. I held his gaze as I began a gentle roll of my hips. Papa dropped his head and pressed his forehead to my chest as he moved his hips with mine. 

"Will we be okay?" I whispered, holding Papa close. His fingers gripped my hips. 

"I think so," he replied, lifting his head to look at me. "I'm going to try."

"I don't want to lose you again," I cried. 

"I don't want to lose you either," Papa said, kissing along my neck. "What happened in our past is just that; our past. The best we can do is make sure we don't make it our future, yes?"

"Yes, Alessandro," I agreed, dragging my lips to his and kissing him deeply. 

It was the best I could hope for and I knew that as long as we both put in the work, we would be okay.


End file.
